Well- I am feeling much better today. Like I said I let things get to me from time to time but for the most part I am a very happy care free person. So- I'm back! I'll admit I have been chatting with someone that I think would be a really great match as my Dom. Of course I have a lot to still learn about this person- but are we ever finished getting to know ourselves or others? I don't think so- I think it is great to always explore things about yourself and others. So- I don't want to say too much because he's not really big about being posted about :) I'll just talk about my impressions so far.
Well- I have found it hard to find one that matches my personality and can put up with my wackiness! I can be a bit odd at times as I'm sure you all know by now and I tend to be a little fiesty sometimes, which a lot of Dom's do not like. It seems he likes my bratiness from time to time which is good because I can't change that about myself- that is just me. You either like it or you don't. I'm not changing my personality to suit someone- if they can't handle it then we are not the right match. I find it easy to talk to him about anything and I think that is very important when it comes to BDSM. He seems to be (ok- sorry if you don't like this word but it's totally true :) a sweetheart, but a Dom at the right times. I want to find someone I can talk to as a friend before we even think about getting into D/s. So far I have to say I think I have found that.
The only thing I wonder about still at this point is what exactly the dynamic would be between us if he decides he wants to own me. I know we would only see each other maybe a few times a month- which works for both of us actaully- so that is great. But what would it be like in between those times? Would there be no interaction at all? I'm not sure lol. I honestly must say I am the type that is really into the mental aspect of things and really enjoy the control. I like rules and I like tasks. Honestly when looking for a Dom I need that dynamic- I need someone who likes to set rules and enforce them. So that is something that needs to be discussed. I know your all thinking- "why not just ask him then?" Well I would but lately he seems very busy and I'm a very shy person so I don't want to seem overbearing and ask questions when he has so many other things going on. That's just me- I don't want to take up peoples time if I don't have to. So I'm waiting patiently to see how it goes at this point. But yes- I am very impressed with him- it takes a lot for me to put that out there because even though I may seem like the type that speaks my mind all the time- when it comes to putting myself out there as a possible sub for someone I get shy and kind of flip out inside a little. I'm just being honest lol- maybe because I have never been owned so I have no idea what to really expect. Plus for me to even talk to a total stranger on the street is hard enough! So of course I'm going to have a hard time talking to someone I might possibly have to trust with my well being.
I will say this much- I think I get along with this individual better than I have with any other. I think we view D/s a lot in the same way which is great. So at this point so far so good. So hopefully we can keep chatting and getting to know each other better because I think we could really have a lot of fun together. More to come hopefully...
